Terrible Twos

Definition:

To hit the terrible twos: to hit head against wall because toddler decide to not cooperate in crucial moments such as when crossing the road. To scream at the top of one's head because one's child decide to play hide and seek in clothes rails in shops and won't listen when being called once, twice, twenty times. To loose one's marbles when toddler laughs at one's face when being told off.

It can go further than this I promise you!

Elliott is driving us mad! No later than 3 or 4 weeks ago I thought to myself that we were quite lucky since he seemed to go through a mild phase of terrible twos. Now you see I am quite good with tantrums, I find it pretty easy to ignore them. Quite often I might be walking around him while he is rolling around on the floor, acting as if he wasn't there. I think that's why he never has long tantrums. They stop very quickly and most of the time don't even start when distraction is offered really quickly. So I thought it is not that hard. This was until I discovered attitude, eyes rolling around and acting as if I wasn't there at all. You know that kind of look that says "that voice shouting at me, I wonder where it is coming from..." I just cannot cope with this, I hate being ignored!

No later than today we have spent a whole shopping trip taking things from his hands and putting them back on the shelves, while he would run away and touch something else. This whole shopping trip was constant stress and even if he was tied up to his pushchair (when it was too much to cope with) because then you would get the "let me out!" malarchy.

So I think that this is it, we are in the terrible 2's!

Now I read somewhere that Terrible Twos start as early as 9 months and can last until their forth birthday! Can we cope this long? Can we (the parent) get out of this phase without physical or psychological damage?!

Along with all the advice given to get through this phase here is what was recommended:

Try and stay positive (How?)... this is just a phase (Thank God for that!) and it is as hard for your child as it is for you (yeah right). Try to focus on the positive behaviour and enjoy your toddler as much as possible (ok I agree). When it all gets too much (leave the house), have a little book that you could call "Your naughty moments" and write about his tantrums. First it will help you see that it is not that bad, then you will be able to read them with him later, and hopefully both of you will have a great laugh! (NOT THAT BAD?! Who are they fooling?!!! It is bloody hard!)

If you are really down one day, because it seems that the day has been a long battle (and you just want to give up), take time off just for yourself when your partner comes home. If you are single or without the help of your partner on hand (you are my hero), maybe ask a friend or family (or people you really hate) to look after the children for at least a couple of hours. It will give you some time on your own (to reflect on what you have done in your past life to deserve this). Use that time to do something positive for you, that you enjoy doing (shopping with husband's credit card). It can be anything as long as you are having fun and you are feeling relaxed (with hubby's credit card you bet we will be having fun!).

And last is my personal suggestion: if none of this work, try Meditation... mediTAtion I said not mediCAtion!

Ok now I am waiting for good, juicy, laugh out loud Terrible Twos stories! Over to you...

Peggy, originally from France, blogs at Perfectly Happy Mum. And she is, perfectly happy that is. She is mum to two energetic boys and an Antenatal and Postnatal coach.

Photo credit: hybridotus

Comments

[Gemma Johnson]

Great article and exactly what I am going through at the moment with my little 2 year old critter Teddy!

I have now resorted to a "Time-out" pad that bleeps to green once his minute is over, he is supposed to sit on the pad but more often than not lays across it with an arched back and red face that makes it confused so it stays on longer :-)

I haven't reached the "ignore it" bit yet and feel my stress levels rise as soon as he pulls a contorted face and shrieks.

I have another one on the way so by the time that one is 2, hopefully Ted will be coming to the end of his "age 4" wobblers.

Laughing during the tantum seems to flame the fire - but sometimes you just can't help but giggle!